Why I'm a MOPS Mommy

Years ago, I gave birth to the wildest adventure I've ever known: my precious son. I have been perpetually tired since the day he was born. I laugh, I cry, I nap. Some of you know what I'm talking about. Just saying the word "boys" makes you tired. Now I'm not saying girls are easy, I'm just saying that boys are...wide open, loud, non-stop, 90mph whirlwinds of sticky, smelling, bug-collecting, stomping, free-for-all, stop every now and then to kiss you then drive you up the wall, buckets of joy.

He came early and had to be nursed or fed every 2-3 hrs. By the time I nursed, diapered, swaddled, pumped, cleaned everything, and set up for the next round it was time to do it all over again. Ya'll remember those first moths of sleep deprivation. I was tired all the time. Exhausted, really. Even though my doctor said it is harder for moms to bounce back when they are "older first timers" I was still beating myself up a little about it. I wanted so badly to enjoy every second. I figured, I'll rest later. Later came and he was crawling, then walking, then running! You get the picture.

Little-boy wrangling, family obligations, home keeping, Church obligations...the world kept spinning while I grew more and more tired. I felt old. I felt worn out. Did I say I felt, old? Old. Really, really old. I felt a little awkward at library day- the other moms were SO much younger than me. I didn't know it at the time but I had let myself get withdrawn and just a tad bit depressed.

Then it happened. One of the other moms at library day invited me to a Mothers of Preschoolers (MOPS) meeting. Yeah right... a room full of barbie dolls half my age with their perfect little outfits and their perfect little children with no stains or sticky stuff. I was not interested. No way. It seemed like just one more thing to make me feel pressured and inadequate. Since I told her I would think about it, I did. My son is virtually an only child (his teen-age half-siblings no longer live with us) and a homeschooler, I thought being around other kids his age would be good for him. I went for him.

The kids were downstairs and the moms were upstairs at a local church. I felt so insecure. They were all a good bit younger. The voices in my head were saying I wouldn't fit in but they were so sweet. Everyone was so friendly. Over the next few meetings, I realized they weren't perfect little moms. Nope, not at all.  They had in-a-hurry pony tails, tired eyes and yucky stains too. The screaming from the children's area assured me their kids weren't perfect little tikes either. They were...like me. They were a lot like me. That was two years ago.

Since then, I have developed friendships with some of the most beautiful, caring ladies on the planet. We have laughed, cried, played, and learned together. My son has playmates and playdates galore. This fall I will be assuming a small leadership position within the group. I am so excited to attend the international convention in August.

I am still tired. Are you kidding? The older he gets, the faster and stronger he gets! I am no longer isolated. I am not withdrawn. I know I'm not alone. As women, we are as diverse and unique as we can be. As moms, though, we share the same joys and struggles. We understand each other. We have a sisterhood that strengthens us.

MOPS, is an international organization dedicated to supporting, nurturing, educating, and empowering moms through community building. Their mission statement reads, "MOPS International exists to encourage, equip and develop every mother of preschoolers to realize her potential as a woman, mother and leader in the name of Jesus Christ."  There are local chapters virtually everywhere. Their web page has a group locator and super resources for every single kind of mom. Even the old and tired ones, like me.

I encourage  you to give it a try. You may be busy, you may be shy, but you just may change your life!  Are you a part of a MOPS group? Have you thought it wasn't for you? Why? Share your stories with me. Moms don't let other moms mother alone (yeah, I had to work in the slogan somehow).

Three in Thirty : A Late Start

My life and #3in30 got just a tiny bit interrupted during December and January (I'll post about that later over on Practical Faith for Everyday Life). My overall goals for 2012 are in three broad categories:

Faith

Home & Family

Social Media

My goals for January/ February (a little late than never):

1. Complete the 31 Days to Pray For Your Spouse Challenge
2. Create or find an existing gratitude journal utilizing photographs
3. Publish my post on organizational habits/tips and post about my recent faith trial.

These were some of the things that I wanted to accomplish in January - thank goodness for "carry over," huh? I'm super excited about the 31 Days to Pray challenge. I'm also so thankful for the privilege of praying for my husband.  He's truly a God-sent spouse.  I plan to post the organizational post this week here on MommieKate. The faith trial post...well, lets just say that's a bit of a test for me. It's hard for me to share the really personal stuff.  I posted about our pregnancy loss a year after it happened. It took a whole year just to work up the nerve.  I started blogging because I wanted to share my faith and encourage other women.  I've realized that sometimes I have to dig a little deeper. You can get fluff anywhere, right? Maybe what I've been through can bless someone else and the only way to know is to share it. Share it, I will.

Although the little #3in30 break was not planned- and I took a break from EVERYthing- I was able to spend time loving my family and living simply. That's what it's all about, anyway!

Twice As Nice

We have added a new curriculum to our preschool: Joyful Heart Bible And Rhyme for 3 year olds. I love this free, Bible-based program.  It includes lesson plans and craft/activity suggestions.  I am still using the Letter of The Week.  I think between the two, we are building a solid Biblical and academic foundation.

One of my favorite things about homeschooling is the flexibility to use more than one resource for teaching.  Nothing is set in stone.  I can keep what I like and disregard what's not for us. I have learned so much this year about what works for us and what doesn't.  I'm so glad that I started with preschool.  I don't feel that trial and error (and there have been tons of error) at this point is detrimental to his overall education- I mean, really... he's just three!

Now that we are using more than one curriculum, I am picking and choosing lessons between the two.  To help keep me focused, I designed my own lesson plan/worksheet. AND...I'm offering this freebie to you (go ahead, squeal if you want)!  There are so many great planners out there.  I just needed something a little more basic.  I like looking at the whole week, too. Click here for Scribd download. (The lines looks a little off in the preview window but "reappear" in the download.)

I've included some photos of other things we've added to our class room goodies.  

Happy Homeschooling!

Three in Thirty

For week three encouragement, I offer two of my favorite Bible confessions:

I commit my ways unto the Lord; I trust in Him & He brings them to pass. (Ps 37:5)

In Christ I always triumph. (2 Cor 2:14)

I've completed the dreaded storage food container cabinet.  Yippee! Having checked that off my list I certainly feel triumphant! I hope you're progressing and having fun with your goals this month.  One more week- WE CAN DO IT !

Weight Loss Wednesday

The past week has been productive in other areas but my fitness goals- not so much.  I've been a slug.  There.  I said it.  A slug.  I've done only half of my workouts.  My husband has been making banana splits.  Yes, I ate one.  It was HUGE.  I did weigh last night (I held my breath).  It's the same.  That's better than gaining, I suppose.  Well, yeah...it's better.  (Loosing is even better, though.)    

Homeschool Photos

Here are some photos of our classroom (back porch) and our work.  We are using the Letter of the Week curriculum by Confessions of a Homeschooler.  We also use many of the Melissa & Doug toys.

3 in 30 - Check Up

Here's my progress report:

Relationship With God
I am so happy to report I am still reading a chapter of Proverbs every morning.  I use the Psalms and Proverbs plan in the morning and the Life Journal plan at night from YouVersion.  It's been a great way to start and end the day.
Social Media Participation
I have participated in not just one but several blog hops this month. I've added so many new peeps to my blog reader.  It has been SO TOTALLY worth the challenge of finding the time to blog read & write.
Organization
The cabinets with the food storage containers all falling out...well...um...they're still waiting for me.

To all my 3in30 friends: keep up the good work!

Thankful Thursday

I'm so excited to be participating in my first Thankful Thursday post!

I am thankful for a kind and supportive husband.

He has been wonderfully helpful by entertaining our busy three year old in the evenings to give me blogging time.  Even though he really doesn't "get it" when it comes to social media, he honors my need for a little time to myself.  I appreciate and love him so much.

To join Thankful Thursday, click here to visit Spiritually Unequal Marriage.

Weight Loss Wednesday- Week 2

I'm still in!  I've done a thirty minute cardio- workout every other day.  I've been using the Dance Central and the Your Shape Xbox Kinect video games. It's so much fun!  I need to adjust my schedule to work out before my son wakes up.  He just can't stay out of the action which makes it hard to keep up my momentum.

My goal to limit eating out to once a week was shot. We traveled out of town over the weekend to celebrate Christmas with Hubby's family. I'll just have to buckle down this week in that department. Still... I lost two pounds.  Yippee!

Don't forget to use the #momfit hashtag on Twitter and visit Domestically Challenged to link up.

Three in Thirty

OK, OK, OKAY...you win.  I've read your tweets, visited your blogs and now (gasp) I (who totally does not do New Year Resolutions) have joined in the #3in30.  I've been inspired! PLUS, the idea of taking baby steps helps...committing to one month at a time just seems so much more do-able for me.  Having a community to do it with is, well, just plain FUN. So- I'm all in.

This year I want to grow in my relationship with God, dedicate more time to social media fun, and finish some of the home chores that I've been avoiding. Now thanks to 3in30, I can do it one little 'ole month at a time.

My goals for this month:

1. Add a chapter of Proverbs every day to my Bible reading plan (to grow wiser)
2. Participate in at least one blog hop every month (to be more social)
3. Clean out the food storage container portion of my cabinets (to get kitchen organized)

So far, I have done well. I've read a Proverbs every morning.  I have participated in THREE link-ups.  I have not yet tackled the two cabinets.  I'm waiting for hubby's day off so he can have some time out of the house with our son.  I figure I'll get it done faster with no interruptions.

With 3in30, I can get it together AND meet new friends.  You gotta' love that!

Weight Loss Wednesday

I'm very excited about Weight Loss Wednesday!  Alana Morales at Domestically Challenged has started a new feature on her blog about weight loss.  She's offering encouragement, tips, interviews, accountability and the opportunity for others to join her in the fun.  While I can't promise a blog post on the subject every Wednesday, I can tweet- tweet- tweet about it. She and I have started a special Twitter hashtag ( #momfit ) .

My goal is to loose ten pounds (and wear my skinny jeans) by summer.  I'll be walking and using  Wii  & Xbox Kinect video fitness games.  Really, why should the kids get to have all the fun? I plan to limit dining out to one day a week.  I may throw in some weights too

If getting fit is one of your New Year's goals, I hope you'll join the fun. Go visit Alana for details how to join her Weight Loss Wednesday.  Don't forget to use #momfit if you want to tweet your fitness plans/ progress.

Report Card Time!

Oh how I used to hold my breath at report card time.  Not that I had anything to worry about.  I was a solid A-B student, but there was this awful feeling. You know, I thought it would be good but you just never know.  Things happen.  Funny, the things I used to worry about.  Now that I am homeschooling my son, I wonder if we'll do report cards.  Right now, we are pre-schooling.  Report cards at this stage just seem unnecessary.  Then again I do have to monitor his progress- ah, who knows?  Right now, posting our work on the wall seems to be enough reward.

We are half-way through the school year.  During our holiday break, I've reflected on what has worked and what hasn't so far. Our Letter Of The Week Curriculum by Confessions of a Homeschooler has been terrific. Not that we get through all the activities, but it holds my son's interest and it's super easy to implement.  It's so rewarding to watch him learn.  Homeschooling has been great for our relationship too.  At the end of the day, I feel like I have spent directed, intentional time with him-  not just in the same house together time.  The flexibility of homeschooling has been great.  We've had an extended holiday due to some family emergencies that arose right before Christmas.  We've done some of the lessons in bed- how great is that?!

I need to get more disciplined about sticking to our daily routine. Some aspects of this year have been about "working out the kinks."  We belong to a Christian Homeschooling group and a MOPS group to squelch socialization concerns. All in all, I am so glad that I decided to pre-school at home.  I've learned so much and enjoyed visiting with the other HS Moms from the Hip Homeschool Hop. Cheers for a great semester: A+!

How To Survive Loss During The Holiday Season

You were expecting something more festive, right? I know, jingle bells and all...but tragedies don't wait for convenient dates on the calender. Grief and coping with loss can be even more difficult when everyone else is celebrating.  I write this post hoping to help if you or someone you know is experiencing a loss or crisis.  It can be so hard but you can survive.  I know because I did...and this is part of my story.

Last year between Christmas and New Year my unborn baby died. For several days our world stood still while we waited to see a heartbeat.  We had seen it just two weeks before- blinking like a Christmas tree light.  And then nothing, only silent stillness on a sonogram.  The last thing I remember before surgery was trying so hard not to sob and wondering what in the world had caused that sweet little light to quit blinking.  While everyone else was celebrating my husband and I were grieving.  For weeks after, we waited on negative test results to rule out a rare form of cancer. I want to share what I learned through the healing process. Maybe it can give you a little hope.  Or at least I want to let you know that you're not alone.  Someone knows and cares that your heart is breaking.  I do and that's why I'm offering what worked for me.  Use what you can and dismiss the rest.

1. Allow yourself to grieve.  Forget the stiff upper chin.  You don't get extra points for suffering in silence. It's okay to show your hurt. Whether its death, divorce, or a pink slip: loss HURTS and pretending that it doesn't helps no one. That being said, you can't wallow in it forever either.  We had a private memorial service at Church one week after my surgery.  I let myself cry and mourn that week but had determined that once the service was over I WOULD BEGIN TO HEAL.  It's important to allow yourself to move forward.
2. Hit the autopilot button. I had a hard time dealing with people's (mostly stupid) statements so I just went into robot mode and mechanically replied "thank you for your prayers" to whatever comment was offered.  I figure that most people don't mean to be hurtful- they just truly don't know what to say. Side note: if your loved one has a miscarriage DO NOT say things like "something was probably wrong with it anyway," "at least you didn't get to hold it," or "did the doctor say what you did wrong?" Just say "I'm sorry for your loss.  I'll be praying for you." 
3. Quit asking "why."  Talk about it with a friend or a professional but don't get stuck in the "why" stage. There may be a medical reason that can physically help you; however, there is no emotionally acceptable or comforting answer.  Bad things happen.  Very bad things happen and trying to make sense out of the senseless only tortures you and prolongs your pain.  I remember crying out to God.  I didn't get a reason why but I did get reminded that He knew exactly how it felt to lose a child. 
4. Resume your daily routines- whether you feel like it or not.  Staying engaged is essential to keep short term grief from turning into long term depression. Shower, eat, work, exercise.  Don't give up on life just because you're hurting.  Don't give up on God, either- even if your faith is wavering.  Keep plugging along.  Keep moving forward.  Baby steps count! You'll get a little bit stronger and better everyday. You will get better.
5. Realize that you won't ever get over it but you will move past it.  There is a difference. It is vitally important to remember that while the feelings of loss and sadness will remain, the intense pain will one day subside.  Don't feel guilty for beginning to get better, for enjoying others, and life again, or for growing beyond the grief. Life never stands still.  Everything changes: the good, the bad- it all moves along. 

Every one's process and time is unique.  Don't push yourself too fast or too hard.  Don't beat yourself up- for feeling bad or for feeling good.  Emotions vary- it's normal.  If you think you are not getting better or if you ever think about harming yourself or others, PLEASE GET HELP.  Your pastor, doctor, or mental health care center can direct you to available resources.

Over the past two years my husband and I have experienced several losses. I still cry a little sometimes. I am still healing.  I'm still growing. You will too.

HomeSchool Preschool ROCKS!

Six weeks ago I officially joined the many who have decided (at least for now) to educate my son at home. Let me just say: IT IS AWESOME!  I admit, I didn't feel that way at first.  I was excited and then (while doing endless internet research) it hit me.  Hit me hard.  I mean, this is one of the biggest decisions that will affect my little boy FOR LIFE.  I started to panic. Have you seen the ka-zillion choices out there? There are so many different education styles and ten times that in curriculum choices. I became overwhelmed.  Nauseated even. And then...

I found some lovely blogs that helped bring me back to "OK, I can do this" state.  More on them later (plus links). While I am in no way an expert, I did figure out a few things over the summer.  Here is a summary of my Crash Course for Home School Newbies:

• Start with the legalities. Find out what the laws are in your state.  This will help guide you through your curriculum choices. You may not even want or need a curriculum. My state is one that has few requirements and gives parents great freedom.
• Consider your own skills and limitations as well as your family's.  Do you follow a tight schedule, a flexible routine, or do you fly by the seat of your pants?  Are you creative?  Do you need the guidance of a curriculum? How much guidance?  What is your budget? I chose mine based on flexibility and budget.
• What support will you have? Is your spouse on board?  Will he be able to help - to what degree?  Is there a homeschooling group in your area? I joined a local Christian HS group to get ideas & guidance from veteran parents and for the field trip opportunities. 
• Have a firm idea of why you want to pursue this. You will want it in neon flashing lights.  I'm not kidding- it starts with the curriculum choices, the HOURS of prep work, and ends with a lot of negative questions and comments from others. It's fun, it's rewarding, but it is HARD WORK.
• Relax and keep it all in perspective.  Nothing is set it stone. You will explore and change styles, methods, and curriculum many times as you grow and your school days go by.  You'll learn as you go. You may even change your mind all together about home education. Homeschooling is ALL ABOUT FLEXIBILITY and doing what is best for each stage of your family's life.  

Don't stress.  Trust God to guide you.  Trust yourself.  Have fun.

I want to give blog hugs to Sue, thehomeschoolchick and to Erica at confessionsofahomeschooler. These ladies gave me confidence, a place to start, and shared a sense of humor in the process. They have great links to other helpful sites. If you are homeschooling you probably already know them.  If you are still in the consideration stage, go check out their sites- you'll be glad you did. Also, to find out your state's laws visit http://www.hslda.org/laws/default.asp.  HAPPY HOMESCHOOLING!



For more great links check out the Hip Homeschool Blog Hop:

iFellowship

  

Please be patient with me while I get the hang of this blog hop!
I hope you'll join me.  Click above.

How I Abide in Him

I am the vine, ye are the branches: He that abideth in me, and I in him, the same bringeth forth much fruit: for without me ye can do nothing.  (KJV) John 15:5


For so long I knew that verse to mean I am nothing without Jesus.  While that is true on a certain level, there is so much more.  Meditate on that verse. Dig deeper.  Ponder it awhile...

He supplies me.  If He lives in me and I remain in Him, I am fruitful.  I am productive. I am successful. It is Christ that gives me what I need to accomplish the life before me.  He works in me.  He works through me.  Have you ever wondered how?  Have you ever felt like it wasn't working? Why?

It's that word "abide."  There's the key.  I must abide in Him.  From experience let me tell you that you cannot abide in Him with just a weekly Church service and a nightie-nite prayer.  Abide means to dwell, live, remain, endure.  It's a pretty weighty word.  Now it seems complicated- almost daunting.  Like any other relationship, it does take time.  There is just no way around it.  It doesn't; however, have to be complicated.  Trying to set aside a particular block of time was not working for me.  I ended up overwhelmed, discouraged, and feeling guilty because it was a task I couldn't accomplish.  That's just it, though.  Jesus is not a task.  He is a person.  One who wants you to actually ENJOY time with Him. If spending time with our Lord has been difficult for you, don't give up!  I de-mystified and simplified. Making small adjustments in my routine has made all the difference in the world for me.  Let me show you what I mean...

I do five very simple things every day to keep in touch with Jesus. These things don't take much time at all when I spread them throughout my day.

• Morning Devotion.  I use From Faith to Faith by Kenneth & Gloria Copeland.  You can purchase the book or view it for free online. They will even email it to you upon request. I have the link on my iPhone so I can view it anytime/ anywhere.
• Daily Scripture Meditation. The Wonderful Names of Our Wonderful Lord is an excellent one minute devotion by Charles Hurburt and T.C. Horton.  While it is available in paperback, I use the mobile version on my iPhone. 
• Scripture Confession.  I have compiled a notebook of scriptures that I recite out loud throughout the day.  I rotate them.  One day I'll say the ones on health, then one day on parenting, one day on finances.  You get the idea.
• I pray all day long.  Not the stop what you're doing, formal kind of prayers- hardly!  I say the "Good Morning Lord!  Help me face the day" kind of prayer.  You know: like,"O Lord, show me how to handle this."  "Son is jumping on my last nerve, what do You want me to do with him? "Thank you for putting the milk on sale!"  I talk to God all day long like I would to my husband, my friends, or anyone else.  I'm not disrespectful but I am familiar.
• Evening Bible Time.  Yes, yes, you know me well... I have an iPhone app for that too!  (Face it: its just FUN that way!) I like the Robert Roberts plan.  Two- Four chapters a night takes all of 15 minutes.   

Of course, if you can do more that's great.  If not, do what you can. Jesus knows and He understands. Keeping it simple, fun, and weaving it into my minute-by-minute daily routine has made it do-able for me.  My faith is no longer an ideal.  It is PRACTICAL.  It is real and IT WORKS.

What You May Not Know...One Lovely Blog Award

I would like to thank Tonya at http://www.redheadthoughts-tonya.blogspot.com/ for giving me the One Lovely Blog Award!  I feel so very special.  And happy.  And (shhhhh...whisper it) popular.  It's so encouraging to know that people actually look at my blog - and like it.  I'm thrilled!

The rules are as follows: You thank the person who nominated you, share eight things about yourself that others may not know, and pass the award on to another blogger whom you love.  
     
Did you know...?
1.  I could eat Mexican food for EVERY meal, EVERY day, FOREVER.  
2.  I also have red hair.  Auburn, really-with highlights to cover extremely premature gray. (OK, not THAT premature.)
3.  If you want to bribe me, I can be bought cheap with a Vanilla Dr. Pepper from Sonic (Happy Hour prices from 2pm-4pm if anyone is driving by and coming my way.  Just saying...)
4.  I'm a late bloomer.  Married at 35.  Miracle Son at 37.   Good things take time so don't be in such a rush.  
5.  Prior to this domestic bliss, I would have been the least likely person you would think would enjoy such a life.  Homemaking was the farthermost thing on my radar.  Who knew?
6.  Except for the indulgence of eating out (where nutrition rules are flung out the window once a week), we eat no refined sugar.  NONE.  NADA.  Not even corn syrup, dextrose, or anything that can not be easily spelled or pronounced.    
7.  I'm not a materialistic person.  Really, I'm not- but I am so totally into my iPhone.  How did I live without it?  There is an app for EVERYTHING.  It has my phone, my datebook, my music, my Bible, my recipes, my photos, AND I can surf the web.  How great is that?  My husband thinks I love it as much as I love him. I don't but almost.  OK, I do.  Not really, but sort of. 
8.  Speaking of iPhone: I am obsessed with Words With Friends.  


Now that you know ALL about me, go visit Suzie Q at http://imarriedamoronandsurvived.blogspot.com/.  I am passing this award to her.  She is AMAZING.  Her blog is sure to inform and inspire you.

                           

Chic Click Carnival

I am so excited about participating in the Chic Click Carnival hosted by Chic Chick Media. My site is all about saving money, living simply, and enjoying the Blessings of our Lord. If you've read some of my first posts about saving money, you know I LOVE coupons!   Sooooooo...

Today I am featuring my favorite peep of the week: Valerie, TheCuteCouponer.  I found out about her blog over at BlogFrog.  Loving coupons, I had to go visit her site at http://www.thecutecouponer.blogspot.com. Look though her archives for some great ways to save when shopping.  While you're browsing, check out Visit Our Peeps.  Have Fun!

Thank You

I have been exploring the Blog World and social media sites this summer.  All I can say is, "WOW!"  No, that's not all I can say but it is a good summary.  There are all sorts of places to visit and people to meet.  For the most part, this has been SO MUCH FUN.  (I've seen some things I could live without... you take the good /dismiss the bad.) I had no idea what I was in for when I started blogging.  I guess I didn't know what to expect. What would people think?  I started so sheepishly and somewhat apprehensive about connecting with virtual strangers.

Since then, I've joined Google Friends, Twitter, Twitter Moms, and BlogFrog.  I have met so many wonderful people.  Through the Blogs and Communities I've read your stories: laughed, cried, admired, and learned so much.  Some of you have even "followed" me in some way or another.  I want to thank you for putting yourselves out there. Thank you for welcoming me when I did.  I have genuinely enjoyed getting to know you.  Thank you for sharing yourselves and your stories.

Sunshine Blog Award

Yippee!  Big Fat Mama at http://www.cookingupfaith.com has given me the Sunshine Blog Award.  Is that cool, or what?  You really have no idea how much that means to me!  Thank you so much!

                                                  
Winners are asked to select 12 other recipients to pass on their awards. Selecting only twelve is TOUGH!  Here are my selections- in no particular order:


     http://www.redheadthoughts-tonya.blogspot.com
     http://www.homemakerchronicles.com
     http://www.twinkiemommie.blogspot.com
     http://www.embracinghome.com
     http://www.bobjenjack.blogspot.com
     http://www.showmemama.blogspot.com
     http://www.incourage.me
     http://www.mamaondgo.blogspot.com
     http://www.thehomeschoolchick.com
     http://www.loveshinesforall.blogspot.com
     http://www.faithbarista.com
     http://www.bylittlehands.typepad.com


I encourage you to check out these amazing blogs.  Thanks again to Big Fat Mama! 


Winners may cut & paste then pass on to their twelve choices.